


A Visit from St. Egoraptor

by OctoberSpirit



Category: Game Grumps, Video Blogging RPF, markiplier - Fandom, youtube - Fandom
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Eve, Gen, Poetry, Reindeer, Twas the Night Before Christmas, Winter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-25
Updated: 2016-12-25
Packaged: 2018-09-11 23:42:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9043622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OctoberSpirit/pseuds/OctoberSpirit
Summary: Mark has a moderately unusual Christmas Eve experience. In retrospect, it's not that surprising.(I totally rewrote 'Twas the Night Before Christmas.)





	

‘Twas the night before Christmas, at least in LA—  
For Dan, Phil, Jack, and Pewds, ‘twas in fact Christmas Day.  
But for Mark, the clock chimed out eleven at night,  
And he scritched Chica’s ears as he reached for the light.

All his friends and his loved ones were likely asleep,  
But Mark texted “goodnight” before counting his sheep.  
His eyelids grew heavy, mind drifting toward dreams,  
When the silence was shattered by thudding and screams.

“Oh, godDAMMIT!” A voice echoed out of the smog;  
Mark jumped out of bed and tripped over his dog.  
He recovered and made for the window with poise,  
Which vanished when he spied the source of the noise:

‘Twas Arin, decked out in a red coat and hat,  
With a sleigh full of gifts and an elf-costumed cat.  
And pulling the sled as it hurled through the sky  
Were the Game Grumps and Holly—turns out, they can fly!

They were dressed up as deer, with bright antlers and hooves,  
And cute onesies to keep them all snug on the roofs.  
Their noses were painted; t’were tails on their butts,  
As they flew past the window (and Mark’s frantic “WHAT”s).

“Now, Suzy; now, Barry; now, Ross, Dan, and Brian!  
On, Vernon; on, Holly; on, Jack, Matt, and Ryan!  
To the top of the house, without hitting more walls!  
And don’t challenge me, Ross; you don’t have the rein-balls!”

As Arin called out, the Grumps swooped in to land;  
Mark wondered if he should go offer a hand.  
The rooftop was angled, not built for a sleigh,  
And a hospital’s no place to spend Christmas Day.

But before Mark could move, he did hear a soft sound—  
‘Twas the thump of the sled as it safely touched down  
And the shuffling of friends on his roof in hoofed feet,  
So Mark whipped out his phone and he tweeted a tweet.

“All the @GameGrumps in costumes came out of the sky.  
They’re up on the housetop! I swear I’m not high.”  
Then his phone gave a buzz in the palm of his hand,  
For @bwecht had replied, “Mind your own business, man.”

Mark huffed but then straightened and made for the stair  
After giving the screen one more halfhearted glare,  
For he heard Arin’s boots on the living room floor,  
And Mark had a few questions, and then several more.

Arin bustled about, a large sack near his feet  
From which he took gifts and then stacked them up neat.  
A smile lit his face with each present retrieval;  
When he laughed, his form shook like a bowl full of evil.

“Dude, what the hell?” Mark demanded, perplexed,  
“You broke into my house! Where’s the courtesy text?  
And why didn’t you tell me our friends can all fly?  
Are these presents a trap? Like a face full of pie?”

Arin’s eyes, they did twinkle; he spoke not a word,  
Merely finished unpacking, Mark’s questions unheard,  
For his headphones were hidden beneath his red cap.  
Then he vanished, his ears full of jolly gift-rap.

Mark gaped like a fish, then he rushed out the door;  
All the Grumps shot him hand-hearts and took off once more.  
They explained not a thing; Arin yelled, merry-bright:  
“Happy holidays, all, and to all, a good night!”

Mark facepalmed and dragged himself into the house;  
Not a creature was stirring, neither Chica nor mouse.  
All the gifts glimmered, innocent, under the tree;  
They could wait til the morning, post-sleep and coffee.

And so if, in December, you hear a strange sound  
While you’re sleeping with nary a witness around,  
Just remember this tale, and do try not to jump  
If you creep out of bed and discover a Grump.

**Author's Note:**

> Happy holidays!
> 
> This is the second fandom for which I've rewritten this poem. XD It's just really fun to mess with!
> 
> You can find me at octoberspirit.tumblr.com if you wanna tumbl with me. :3


End file.
